Tag Archives: Grace

A message of PURPOSE revealed in STAR WARS

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The following is a really great guest post from Eric Anderson .  I asked him to bring the topics of PURPOSE and STAR WARS together for this post and he did a really great job.  Thank you, Eric!  

“Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi, you are my only hope.” This line from Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, is one of the top 100 lines in the whole history of cinema. Although it was not the first line in the movie, it became the first significant line in a franchise that has impacted millions of individuals, as well as culture as a whole. This line brought an old man out of exile into a conflict which spanned a galaxy. Obi-Wan Kenobi had been in exile for nearly 30 years at this point. He was keeping tabs on a child on a desert planet far from his former apprentice. He did not exactly choose this exile. It came after he experienced a battle with a friend who betrayed him and his friend’s new mentor was just too powerful for the few Jedi that were left, to take down. But this line gave him a renewed purpose.

Purpose is a hard thing for us, right? We often struggle with it. Whether as a college student in a boring job with classes that are overwhelming or a businessman who is traveling to another continent for work or play. We live in a culture that does argue over our origins, regularly. In a world where a view like Han Solo’s claim of “Kid, I’ve flown from one side of the galaxy to the other and I’ve seen a lot of strange stuff, but I’ve never seen anything to make me believe there’s one all-powerful force controlling everything,” I would argue that we should take the side of Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan knew the Force. He had used the Force and responded to it time and time again. For him, it was not a struggle, and it doesn’t need to be one for us, either – even in exile.

The Jews in Babylon knew the feeling of exile. They had been in exile for nearly 70 years. They had sought purpose in the exile and were longing to get out of exile. First, we’ll look at the purpose within exile, then the purpose after exile. There were several prophets that can stand out in this time period. Jeremiah did not go into exile, but he wrote a letter to those in exile which is found in Jeremiah 29. Now normally, people focus on verse 11, but we shall look before that at what he actually told them to do while in exile. Verse 7 tells us: “Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it because if it prospers, you too will prosper.” He didn’t want them to just carry on in life, but to live missionally within their context. This fits with Jesus’ teachings. He taught us to share our resources with those who have none. Even when God sends you where you do not want to go, He has people there for you to reach. People for you to love, be generous to, and to which you can share Jesus. I doubt that Obi-Wan just sat there while he was on Tatooine. We know he was looking after Luke from a distance and also that Yoda had told him to train in communing with the Force. Did you really think he became a Force Ghost later on by doing nothing on Tatooine?  In Jeremiah 29:12, after telling us He has a future and a hope for us, God says: “Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” God has a relational and personal purpose for us. Jesus himself said that he calls his disciples “friends” and not just servants (John 15:15). This calling is one that exists both in and out of exile. It never ends and it will continue in eternity.

Exile is never permanent. It is always temporary, even if it feels long. When the 70 years were up, God revealed a particular part of His plan to two different men. One of them was sent to build walls around Jerusalem. Nehemiah felt a calling from God to rebuild the walls around Jerusalem and Ezra felt the calling to build a new temple for worship. They each have their own book in the Bible and I encourage you to read them. It seems that when someone is pulled from exile, throughout scripture they have a role. Paul spends time growing closer to Christ in exile then goes on his missionary journeys after that. Jesus spends forty days fasting in the wilderness and then completes his calling to bring redemption. Obi-Wan’s purpose was to get Luke out of his exile and helping with the rebellion against the Empire. In the newest Star Wars film, we find another person coming out of exile. A girl named Rey. She has been living life as a scavenger on a planet that experienced a huge battle and has many crashed ships on it. She then helps seek Luke Skywalker after enlisting in an army to fight the New Order.

Whatever phase of life you are in, whether you feel exiled to a place you do not like or if you love where you are, God has purpose for you. First of all, for you to enjoy life with Him, and secondly for you to bring His redemption to those around you.

Thank you again, Eric Anderson! And thank you to those that have taken the time to read this blog post.  I pray this one and any others you take the time to read, will bless you and bring increase into your life.  Please help us to reach further and bless more people by sharing this blog with others you know.  Together we can make a difference!    

A Challenge to “Take Each Day Gladiator Style”

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It’s a scorching day at the Colosseum in Rome and the crowd is roaring with anticipation. Suddenly, a steel gate goes up at one end of the arena and the crowd elevates to something way beyond a roar, as a burly man enters carrying a shield by his side and a sword in the other hand. Just as he is making his way into the center of the arena, another steel door disappears into the rock wall and out appears a battle-scarred man, screaming a blood-curdling noise. He charges towards the center of the arena with a shield set tight to his chest and yielding a massive sword. As he arrives at the center and goes from a sprinting charge to a leaping flight and with his sword set to swing, he crashes into the other gladiator and THEN?????

Here we are, a new day of dawning light has come. Your eyes open to the sound of an alarm clock and so it begins. You just entered into the arena of battle for yet another day. How you enter it sets the tone for how your day will go.

So many enter each day with a victim mindset; a “WHY ME” mentality that screams defeat from the very beginning. The facial expression screams, “I give up” before the daily ever truly has the opportunity to produce! So many wake up each day, already with an attitude of total defeat leftover from the day before. As soon as our eyes open, we must engage the day like a gladiator entering the arena of battle. If we surrender, we will find defeat to what we can’t get back.

We MUST take on a warrior mentality when it comes to life. When I picture a gladiator, I picture a warrior that knows defeat is not an option. He knows this mentally and keeps that mindset for the battle he is entering into.

The battle between the two gladiators was taking place in their minds long before they entered the arena. The stage was already set for certain victory in both their minds, but the realization was that someone would not be walking out of that colosseum of alive.

I want to share 10 attributes of a warrior, which can help you be the victor and no longer the victim.

1. Ambition: You will never have what you don’t truly desire!

2. Knowing of Purpose: You must be locked in and focused on your WHY!

3. Physically able: Your family, friends, and dreams need you being the best you can be. YES, I’m talking about how you take care of you which is a reflection of how we also take care of others.

4. Honor: How we honor those in our lives speaks loudly of our character and the person we really are.

5. Compassion: I like the statement that goes something like this: One of the greatest ways for us to succeed is by helping someone else to succeed.

6. Faith: What do you believe in? I myself, have my faith as a Christian and am totally secure in it. Many don’t know what they believe and are tossed daily about by the beliefs of all those around them. YOU and you alone must be set and solid in your faith and not give up or give in, no matter what comes your way.

7. Courage: This is the ability to do something that you know is difficult and dangerous. Courage is a daily decision we will make whether we want to or not. What we don’t face, we will encounter over and over again until we do.

8. Discipline: Do you have a discipline that is self-motivated OR do you require others to guide you through life? Discipline is something we set best for ourselves; we must create a check and balance system to make sure we walk it out.

9. Freedom: You must realize that you have been freed to be all you could ever dream to be. The only thing that can truly stop you is you!

10. Endurance: You must have the ability to endure. Life might not always be the way you want it, but you have got to be willing to push on and NOT give up.

I know there are many more attributes we could list, but these speak loudly to me in my life. You could also expound on each one for your own life.

So which gladiator are you—the one that brings the battle OR the one that has the battle brought to them? We have got to recognize, correct and overcome those weak areas in our lives and move on to conquer the day and be the best we can be!

Now get busy and make this day count!

Originally posted on The Good Men Projects website on 4-2-2016. CLICK HERE TO READ

 

Men, Are You Ready to Make Each Day a “Jump” Day?

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6 steps to taking a glorious leap into the unknown.

For a moment, let me create a visual journey for you. Picture yourself standing on the edge of a very tall and sheer cliff, overlooking a beautiful clear body of water. The cliff is so sheer that you can’t even see what’s below you, but you know the water is there just waiting for you! You look out, and as far as the eyes can see is the beauty of creation. You slowly slide to the edge of the rocks to where you can only feel total emptiness in front of you. What do you do? Do you take a step of faith and hope for the best, or do you turn around and risk this being something that you spend your life regretting not doing? What to do, what to do?

You close your eyes and with one step you find yourself drifting into absolute nothing. At the same time you feel excitement, fear, carelessness and so many more feelings peak and in a matter of seconds, you splash into the end result of your journey. When you come up out of the water, you find yourself overwhelmed by this rush of emotions and you’re out of the water and making the climb up the cliff to do it all over again! CLICK TO READ MORE

Originally Posted on The Good Man Project

Redefining Your Life is Not as Hard as You Think

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The greatest gift we guys can ever give to ourselves, and to our family and friends, is to live this life the best we can!

When 2016 started, many did the traditional New Year’s resolutions and right away fell into a statistic of failed resolutions that is shared by many around the world. Now I know that it is not on purpose but it is a matter of fact, that many make big promises with little results. Losing weight, kicking habits, or just becoming a better version of oneself is not to be reserved for a once a year event, but instead, to be walked out daily.

I have done this year after year, until in 2015 when I took a different path and chose a word and made it my focus for the year. In 2015, the word was “Simplify” and I made some steps throughout the year to simplify my daily world. However, by the end of the year, I discovered that simplifying my life turned into a lifestyle I wanted to embrace.

Now we enter into 2016 and I found the word “Purpose” saying, “Pick me, pick me” and so I did! Purpose can simply be defined as the very reason we exist.

Now purpose for me as a husband, father, friend, public speaker, coach, mentor, CEO for a non-profit, entrepreneur, writer and podcaster is very important and that is the reason for the title of this article. There will never be a life well lived if the purpose for that life is never found, embraced and then walked out.

Sometimes just some small changes can help us redefine the life we are living and here are just a few ideas.

  1. Stop sweating the small stuff. Even though this is an old statement, it is one of great truth. People die daily stressing over things they can’t change. We have got to decide once and for all, “If I can’t change it, I’m not going to stress over it”. Worrying will not change anything BUT our health!
  1. Never allow another to decide the value of you. I myself for years based my worth on what others thought about me. When that is the case, then the life we live will be purely based on what others allow. We must take control of our lives and get off the emotional roller coaster once and for all.
  1. Living life forward creates a sense of value that is life changing all its own. A great way of doing this is by serving others. It could be volunteering your time in your community, at your church, your child’s school, etc. and as we do this, we soon find that we forget about us and our problems and get a new perspective on life. That new perspective could be all we needed to put us on track to living that well lived life.
  1. Be true to you. You’re one of a kind, a masterpiece and so live like it. Stop being a follower of the crowds and start blazing a new trail.
  1. Be adaptable and flexible and learn to flow with the waves and not against them. I think that many feel that if they become adaptable then they are giving up control of their own lives. But that’s so far from the truth! Being adaptable or flexible simply means we are flowing with life, which is better, and not becoming like a ship in the ocean being battered from all sides by the waves that surround it.
  1. Learn to love you because if you don’t find yourself lovable, how can anyone else! If you can’t stand to be around yourself, then how can we expect anyone else to want to be? Many live life with a love/hate relationship with themselves that seeps out and onto other relationships unless we come to terms with our own selves.

These are of course not the end all answers, but simply suggestions to a new start in living a life well lived.

So today, start living your life on purpose with purpose. It truly is up to you!

This article originally appeared on http://goodmenproject.com/ on January 6, 2016

CLICK HERE to go to original post.

Who am I and what am I doing?

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I’m really pumped about this guest post! It’s from the founder of P31 Fitness, Rachel Curtis. My wife is a part of one of the P31 groups here in Texas and she has not been just physically blessed but also spiritually blessed. My daughter Ashley, has now started her own P31 group where she lives in Biloxi, Mississippi. P31 stands for Proverbs 31 and as we all know, it is talking to the women; but guys, don’t stop here – because YOU need this maybe even more than the ladies do! I know you will be blessed by this post, so read on and check out the links below at the end!!!!! Blessings – Keith

I used to think I was alone in this struggle. I used to think that I was the only one who questioned myself and what I am doing each day. But now I see clearly that is just a lie. Most everyone struggles with this at some point in their life! I think somehow we believe a lie that we are alone, that we are the only one that struggles, and I am sure we have all felt like we should just give up. I’m going to be really open and real in this post in hopes that it may bless someone – even just one person – that reads these words.

Do you know who you are? When you are by yourself, and no one is around – are you okay with who you are? Do you let yourself be impacted by other people’s reactions to you? Do you let yourself be impacted by what you think people may be thinking about you?

I will have to say there are times in my life that I know who I am REALLY well, and then there are times that I have NO CLUE – been there? I look back and find that it is in the times when things seem to be sailing smoothly along that I feel the most “sure” of myself. When things are rocky, I am very unsure. So unsure that I want to run far away.… like so far away that no one can find me!! Been there?

Why does this happen to us? Why do we sometimes change like the wind in our confidence and purpose? Why do we question who we are?

For me, I find myself questioning small parts of myself. When I really stop to think about this, the things I am questioning are VERY small parts of myself! Parts that really are pretty insignificant. I can have GREAT things going for me, great successes, feelings of love, relationships are good, but then one LITTLE thing can make me feel like a complete failure! Maybe it was something someone said or didn’t say! Maybe it was just a feeling of insecurity that came up inside of me. Maybe it was…well….anything! I am tired of feeling this way, and I am sure you are too!

Today I challenge myself and I challenge all of you to find a stronger foundation on which we are basing our feelings. To rest in a foundation that doesn’t change based on how we perceive our world that day. To be confident in the creatures that God has designed us to be. Not comparing, not wishing, not striving, not questioning….just resting in who we are. Every part of who we are.

What if we stopped worrying about what others think and started being thankful for who we are? What if we stopped looking for the spotlight and attention, and started letting the true light inside of us shine out to the world? I read a quote that was great, “People who shine from within don’t need the spotlight”. Powerful stuff!! So, I ask us all… are we shining from within today? Are we confident in who we are? Are we peaceful?

I hope you have been challenged by these words to recognize your worth and your purpose…. all without shame, and without insecurity. I know that if we would do this, the world would be a better place because it would see our TRUE selves!! We are enough, we do enough, we were made just as we should have been made! That is good. That is peace. That is light.

CLICK to watch the P31 promo video

CLICK here to more post from Rachel Curtis

CLICK here to go to the P31 website

About Rachel Curtis
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Married to Braughn Curtis, she is a mom to 4 wonderful blessings, Madison, Jaxon, Taylor and Reagan. Braughn and Rachel also own Custom Team Bags, LLC in Trenton, Texas.

Rachel is an ACE Certified Personal Trainer, ACE Certified Lifestyle and Weight Management, BS in Exercise Science and Nutrition, Certified P31 Fitness Trainer, Certified Health Promotions Directory from the Cooper Institute.

As a past teacher and a coach, Rachel has always been interested in helping others with their fitness and health. She held various fitness classes for women in school gyms, cafeterias, and more. When a teacher requested a summer bootcamp, Rachel set up registration. Expecting a smaller group, she was amazed when 110 women came for an intense, challenging summer of bootcamp workouts. The women worked hard, learned about whole health, and wanted to continue. At that point, Rachel and her husband, Braughn, saw the intense need for a program designed specifically for women – all types, all levels, and all areas of health. Braughn and Rachel worked diligently to develop a program based upon Biblical principals of truth. They have enjoyed building the program into a franchised based business, and want to provide opportunities for others to bless women in their towns and communities.

It is a way for trainers and franchise owners alike to get to do what they love – bless others with the gift of health in all areas and empower women to experience freedom and understand their worth in God’s eyes!

What Do You Say?

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I wonder how many were counting the minutes until 2015 would end, in an almost fearful state of mind? I know there was also a group that was embracing every second that 2015 was going to give them; believing to the very last second for breakthrough, healings, restorations, transformations, etc.

Life gives us two options, to embrace and fight against whatever is coming our way OR give up and accept what is. I have found that if I decide to embrace the moment through Christ, it goes much differently than if I fight against it on my own strength and power. Embracing does not mean giving in and giving up, but instead knowing that God has your back and by faith through grace we can do ALL things through Christ.

According to Webster, one of the definitions of embrace means, “to use (an opportunity) eagerly”. In Christ, we have all kinds of opportunities, but on our own we are VERY limited! In Christ, we tap into a limitless power that says, “I CAN”. I CAN do all things through Christ. I CAN do great things. I CAN walk in divine health and wholeness. I CAN live blessed above and beyond all I could ever ask or think. I CAN! I CAN! I CAN!

So, what are you now going to say about 2016? It’s up to you!

“Growing Pains” in your marriage =)

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My wife, Debbie, and I just attended a really great marriage conference hosted by Kirk Cameron, and with special music by Warren Barfield. (You can CLICK HERE and find out more about this conference and upcoming events.) It was a really great date night for us and I wanted to share with the guys out there, what I walked away with from this event.

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Before the main conference started, we had the opportunity to go to a VIP time where Kirk spoke to a small group of us and then did an autograph session afterwards. It was really cool to meet him!

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As I looked around at all of the couples in the room, I wondered what their relationships were like. Now as for me, I’m married to my best friend. We did not spend our childhood growing up together, but when we met, something just clicked. I would say that, YES, it was love at first sight, at least for me =) But let me add, that the road to where we are 23 years later from that first date, has not always been an easy one. I have told on myself many times in my writings and probably will have many more times to do that, but that is not the point of this post. Our journey, although one filled with lots of good, bad and sometimes ugly encounters, always seems to just get stronger and stronger, in our love for one another.

One of the highlights of the night, was when Warren Barfield sang “Love is not a Fight”. I know most of you have probably heard this song, but if you have not, I would recommend CLICKING HERE to go listen to it; truly listen to the words! I know that all couples are at different places and have traveled different journeys, but I believe that Warren’s song says it all, “Love is worth fighting for”!!

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Kirk spoke a simple to follow and easy to understand message all based on one scripture. He used 1 Peter 3:7 (NKJ) “Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.” Now I’m sure if you compared notes with my wife and others there that night, we all had a different take on what he was saying, but I’m going to share in this post what I walked away with.

Here are 6 points based on this scripture:

  1. “Dwell with them” – Spend time with her, invest time getting to know the uniqueness of the person she is. Our investment into our spouse, is important and will strengthen and grow our relationship.
  2. “Understanding” – To understand anything in life we have to grow in the knowledge of it. We should know her, her likes and dislikes, favorite color and so on. Feeling understood is important to almost everyone and so who best should understand your wife, than you?
  3. “Honor” – We as guys, need to move beyond respect and actually honor our wives. We honor her by how we treat her, both in private and public. Both when we are with her and when we are apart. We should NEVER make her the punch line of our jokes and she should never be seen by others as being less than the most important person or thing in our life, second only to God. She is NOT your sister, so remember that in how you treat her. Kirk mentioned that we should inventory all that she does. Start making a written list of all that she does around the house, what she does for you and the children and what she does for others and when that list is finished, you should make sure she knows that she is 100% appreciated.
  4. “Weaker vessel” – Now never think for a moment, that this means that this weakness dictates your right to control her! You’re called by God to be a leader and not a dictator; she can’t follow someone who is not leading her somewhere! I see it as a reference to the fragileness as that of the finest china or other precious item. We should have our wives backs and never allow anyone to make her feel like she has been backed into a corner. I myself have failed at this one and when I think back to those times, I cringe! We should ensure that she feels safe and bring peace to the situations of life. This is one place that my heart was convicted strongly of at the conference. There have been times that we have been driving and Debbie has gotten scared over something I or another driver might have done and instead of comforting and making her feel secure, I responded negatively and got offended.
  5. “Grace of life” – Our love for our wives should be just as God’s love is for us. It should be FREE and not based on what she says and does, but solely on what I know I’m supposed to do and be. Grace defined to me, is simply unmerited favor and kindness. So again, it’s FREE!
  6. “Prayers not be hindered” – Now I don’t believe God turns His back on His kiddos, but I do believe that we can close the door on our blessings. Our love walk is key to the success of all that we put our hands to do. Marriage, business, all areas; so with that said, I believe that if we are not walking in love, then everything is pretty much going to be out of whack and spiraling downhill for us.

These 6 areas I believe are key to having a healthy and blessed marriage and making your wife feel like the queen she is. Always remember that she was God’s daughter before she was your wife! I see God’s grace in this, because if someone hurts my daughter, then they might get to see a side of me that might be very surprising and if God created all things by His words, then I’m sure He could relocate things by His words. Just saying! =)

We need to take responsibility as the God ordained leaders we have been called and created to be. We need to take responsibility for our actions and today, make right the wrongs and ask forgiveness for any areas we have fallen short in.

Make consistency the new normal in these areas and watch your marriage become the one God wants you to have.

Missions

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Keith speaking at the Shiloh church Missions Conference in Sierra Vista, AZ.

Debbie and I just returned from a ministry trip which included me being the main speaker at a mission’s conference. What a special treat to see a church so on fire for missions, that they were not trying to create another ministry group or such, but just bring like minded people together. There were many denominations represented at the conference, BUT not once did we debate doctrine or theology; but instead, we just encouraged and talked about the purpose we all have here on this earth and that brings me to the point of this post!

MISSIONS!!!!!

Missions to me, is one of the most misunderstood subjects. Many think that the mission field is some remote international destination. But that can’t be further from the truth! We use this theory to disqualify ourselves from the calling we all have. Let me say it in a simple and easy to understand way. WE ARE ALL CALLED! Now that does not mean we are all called in the same way, but we are ALL called.

Now you might be saying, “But I’m not, I work a job or own a business and I’m not called to be a missionary.” However, the commission is not limited to some; but instead, it pertains to all! Six times in five different books of the Bible, Jesus gave the great and only commission to us all. Grab your Bible and read the following scriptures: Matthew 10:5-8, Matthew 28:18-20, Mark 16:15-18, Luke 24:47, John 20:21-23, Acts 1:8. So, there are the orders from the real Commander In Chief and where is the real mission field? Take a moment and look down at your feet. You are now seeing “your” mission field. In this mission field that we are walking in day in and day out, we don’t always need something spiritual or some great prophetic word. Many just need to SEE and HEAR the love of Jesus. Sometimes, the greatest impact is made, not through words spoken, but a Kingdom life well lived.

So, there you have it, simple and uncomplicated – your part in the fulfillment of the “Great Commission”. John 3:16 tells us that “God so loved the world, that He gave Jesus. He did not come down and preach a sermon or drop some conviction; but instead, He loved!”

So today, bloom in the mission field you’re walking in, living life so large for Christ that people are drawn to you.

You’re an answer to prayer and we speak Kingdom life over you and yours this day.

BUT!!!!!

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Welcome to another Kingdom Thinking blog post in the Kingdom Relationship series. I’m finding that I’m my best person to focus on when deciding my topics. I guess you could say that I’m telling on myself! So buckle-up, grab a pen, notepad, and Bible, and let’s get this journey underway.

First though, if you have not read the other posts in this series, here are their links:
And Two Shall Become One…
All Or Nothing!
Two In, Two Out

So now back to my story =) This last week, my wife, Debbie, and I had a disagreement. Actually, we had to agree to disagree. BUT I felt I was right and was determined to prove it. Anyways, after I acted like a 5 year-old, she went her way and I went mine, but my conscious got the best of me and so I went back to her office and apologized. Now that would have been fine and dandy, but I did not leave it at I’m sorry. I added the infamous BUT in the sentence! Now that’s all I’m going to say about that. =)

I think it is CRAZY that two words can be so hard for many to speak and if they are spoken, then how hard it can be to not add anything other than “I LOVE YOU” after them. I recently read something that said a good apology has three parts:
1. I’m sorry
2. It’s my fault
3. What can I do to make it better

You might not define this as a good apology, but I think it is for sure one that will make life better than some apologies I have heard. (I also know that silence is an answer that sometimes screams louder than words).

My wife’s uncle, Pastor Jerry Zirkle, was my first pastor and he used to say, “Whoever says I’m sorry first, is right”. Debbie has always told me that I can be the one that is right. =) Right or wrong, an apology is the starting place for every battle to truly end. I believe that just fuming until one decides to grow up and move on, never brings resolution to an issue, BIG or small. We owe it to each other to give an apology and ask for forgiveness. True forgiveness means leaving that issue there and never bringing it up again later.

God designed us to love and to care for not just ourselves, but for one another. Actually, we are to prefer one another above ourselves. Romans 12:10 (AMP) “Love one another with brotherly affection [as members of one family], giving precedence and showing honor to one another.” Admitting you might have said or handled something wrong does not make you a lesser person, but instead, a bigger person than you might have given yourself credit for.

I’m making this post short on purpose, but I’m praying that the impact is eternal. Right now, if there is someone you need to apologize to, then there is no better time than right now.

So that’s the end to this part of the adventure in the Kingdom Relationship series, but I feel that there will be more posts in this series. Until next time, I pray God’s richest over you and yours!

And Two Shall Become One…

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After reading comments from the pictures and posts I put on Facebook from my Anniversary Date Day on May 1st, I was led in my heart to start this series. This is Part 1 to the “Kingdom Relationship” series.

Notice: I am not a professional marriage counselor, nor a perfect husband. My wife has put up with a lot and given more grace than anyone should have to. I write this series from my heart and under the prompting of the Holy Spirit, my hope is that this message will in some way minister to others and bring those relationships to a whole new level – one I call a Kingdom Relationship.

“And the two shall become one flesh, so that they are no longer two, but one flesh.” (‭Mark‬ ‭10‬:‭8‬ AMP)‬‬‬‬‬‬

I had mentioned in my last blog post that I would be starting a series on Kingdom Relationships. I am not doing this because I have all the answers or think I’m the perfect husband. I am just a man who was blessed over 23 years ago with the most amazing woman ever to grace this planet. I’m pretty sure I could write a book on what NOT to do in a marriage. “I’m sorry” and “please forgive me” are words I have spoken way too many times and my wife has always forgiven me and loved me no matter what! We live life forward nowadays, not looking back; and you must do the same. She has truly stuck by my side through the good, the bad and the ugly.

Debbie Spanberger, AKA Angel, I dedicate this series to you and want to say thank you for making me the most happy and blessed man on the planet!

Back to my opening title and scripture. One of the reasons I feel relationships fail, has to do with the fact that many never fully see themselves as “one together”. The word “commitment” is almost a dirty word nowadays, and one that society has perverted in so many ways. We want to be on our own and live like we are on our own, even in our marriages. Separate lives, separate dreams, separate bank accounts and the list keeps going. I’m not asking for you to agree or disagree, I’m simply speaking from what I see and hear around me on a regular basis. Marriage failure rates seem to grow daily. (I talk from experience, as I have gone through the divorce walk and I wish that on no one!)

“Many marriages would be better if the husband and the wife clearly understood that they are on the same side.”
Zig Ziglar

Again, a Kingdom Relationship is not a perfect one. We are human and we are going to mess up. I hear couples say “we never fight” and I want to ask them, “Do you live in the same house and talk to each other?” As male and female, we are wired completely different. (We will get more into that thought later.) I think as males, we have a streak of stupid embedded in us because of some of the things we do and say…. just being real and honest here!

I read an article a few years ago in USA Today that was talking about a growing trend in people living together before marriage, to see if they fit into each other’s lives. They want to see if they like living with each other before they get married so that if they don’t like it, they won’t have to get divorced, just in case the relationship doesn’t work out. How sad of a concept and one that is totally against what the Bible calls marriage. Any level of relationship, especially marriage, is not a trial offer like a piece of software that you try to see if you like it first, but instead, it is a relationship that you enter into fully and committed to from the start.

Nothing I ever put in my posts is meant to be me passing judgment, but instead, to hopefully bring a Christian perspective to those that have ears to hear. I know my readers come from different backgrounds and beliefs, but I will always write and share according to what the Bible says and never add or take away from it. And from that I know that we all can grow and learn.

“Whatever your mindset is when you enter into a relationship, will reveal your staying power during hard times.”
Keith Spanberger

Marriage is clearly defined in Ephesians 5:22-33 (CLICK HEAR TO READ). No gray areas: one man, one woman, fully committed, forever, end of story! So what happened? The lack of commitment as I have said many times already, is the start, but not the full answer.

“Compromise and lack of commitment will destroy any relationship and leave us one day asking why.”
Keith Spanberger

Again, don’t think my wife and I have a perfect marriage, but instead, we have a marriage filled with God’s grace which is crucial for success in anything we do in life.

I have only scratched the surface in this post, but I hope that it stirs your hunger for creating a new fire in your marriage or relationship. Stay with me as we journey deeper in the next post on having a Kingdom Relationship. Also, please share this post with others you know. This blog post and this series are not about lifting me up, but instead, lifting up my God and His Son, Jesus, my savior. My life and marriage would be nothing without Him!